IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME?

I was asking myself that today as I was driving to the florist to pick up an arrangement for the funeral of a man I don't even know. My mother's co-worker passed away and she asked if I would pick up the flowers and drop them off at the funeral home.

Of course I said yes and on the drive down I started to get emotional. Emotional over someone I don't even know. Almost tearing up, I stopped myself and said, "What is wrong with you Aislyn?" I continued driving, trying to figure out why this was getting to me.

Then I realized it, the thought smacked me right in the face. There is NOTHING wrong with me. In fact, I am perfectly fine. Perfectly human. I have always been the person that saved a ladybug, helped a handicapped person by holding a door, rushed some animal the cat drug in to the vet.

So, of course something like this would affect me in some way. I appreciate life, all life, and for that I am blessed. I say thank you at the grocery store, I stop in the middle of the road to put five bucks in the volunteer EMS boot, I put change in the Cancer jars at the gas station. There's nothing wrong with me, there just aren't a whole lot of people that think the way I do. And that's OK.

I don't wear my heart on my sleeve, I guard it carefully and sometimes come across as being harsh or unapproachable, but that comes from years of surrounding myself with people that always wanted something in return.

So, I am sane, there's nothing wrong with me...well nothing serious. HA!

This post is in memory of Frank the Postal Worker.
He's up there in that big post office in the sky, delivering all the letters people wrote to God.

WHAT EVERY WOMAN SHOULD HAVE AND KNOW

Every woman should have:

.... an old love she can imagine going back to...
.... and one who reminds her how far she has come.
.... enough money within her control to move out, rent a place of her own in case she ever wants to or needs to.
.... something perfect to wear if the employer or a date of her dreams wants to see her in a hour.
.... a youth she is content to leave behind.
.... a past juicy enough that she is looking forward to retell in her old age.
.... the realization that she is actually going to have an old age and some money set aside to fund it.
.... a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.
.... one friend who always makes her laugh, one who lets her cry.
.... a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone in her family.
.... eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.
.... a resume that's not even the slightest padded.
.... a feeling of control over her future.

Every woman should know:

.... how to quit a job, break up with a boyfriend, and confront a friend without ruining her friendship.
.... when to try harder and when to walk away.
.... how to have a good time at a party she would never have chose to attend.
.... how to ask for what she wants in a way that makes it most likely, she will get it.
.... that she cannot change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.
.... that her childhood may not have been perfect but it is over.
.... what she would or would not do for love or more.
.... how to live alone even if she does not like it.
.... whom she can trust, whom she cannot and why she should not take it personally.
.... where to go, whether it be her best friends kitchen table, or a charming inn in the woods if her soul needs soothing.
.... what she cannot accomplish in a day, month and a year.
.... how to fall in love without losing herself.




Credit: Pamela Redmond Satran

APPROPRIATE

I've been singing this song in my head for the past week or so.

It really picks up around :47.



Credit: Adam Sandler, The Wedding Singer

THE MAGIC LIST

Okay, since I've noticed we're getting big on the lists here, I should probably talk a little bit about something amazing called, "The Magic List" phenomenon.

Click here to see what I'm talking about.

Have you ever written a list of everything you wanted in a mate, a car, a house, or a job? Did it ever mysteriously come true? The theory in the article above is that it will. And I can attest to that.

In 2000, a friend and I decided to come up with a list of everything SHE wanted in a guy one night after some douchebag frat boy decided to completely blow her off. Right then we make a 6 page list entitled "The Perfect Guy" featuring everything from "has to be good looking" to "doesn't freeze cookies" (don't ask). This list was ridiculous, self-centered and well beyond far fetched. After we printed it out, we hung it on her wall in her dorm room near the foot of her bed. Everyone who stopped in to visit got a good chuckle out of it...that is, until something crazy happened...

No more than two months later, her brother's hunky best friend (of whom she'd had a crush on for 5 years) sends her a 21st birthday card completely out of the blue with a request to take her out sometime . This guy somehow managed to meet every single one of her Magic List criteria and they are now happily married (5 years and counting!)

The above article suggests making lists for all types of things. It also suggests that there are eerie ways in which these lists have a tendency to come true.

So.... what is it that YOU want? I suggest that whatever it is - make a list for it. The only risk you take is wasting too much paper - and trust me, that's not much to lose when there's a chance of getting everything you've ever dreamed of!

THANKSGIVING

Ahhhh....yes. Turkey, stuffing, taters, green beans and oh so much more.

To sum up what I'm thankful for:

In no particular order...

1. My life
2. My family
3. My friends
4. AA
5. Chocolate
6. Starbucks
7. Lower gas prices
8. Matt Lauer
9. The internet
10. My Blackberry
11. Common Sense
12. Turtle Soup (that's personal. I don't really eat turtles)
13. Jimmy Buffett music
14. Elmo (yes...I said it)
15. You Tube
16. iTunes
17. Hi Def TV
18. Fall colors
19. Long walks
20. Being smart

I could probably go on and on...but I won't.

Ya'll have a face-stuffin', belt-un-doing, yehaw of a good Thanksgiving.

Don't drink and drive and don't eat turkey and drive. You'll fall asleep...

I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT

Here are things I'll be looking into doing within the next few months:

- Continuing "Cry Fest 2008" and/or wallowing in self pity until the end of the year.
- Visiting Aislyn
- Salsa dancing (I'm quite good at this, actually, and should really be on Dancing with the Stars - not to toot my own horn or anything)
- Getting a haircut and a manicure with my little sister
- Planning a trip to Ireland. Not that I really have anyone to go with, but you get the point.
- Calling all my friends just to talk.
- Cooking better for myself.
- Exercising. I'm not good at this, but I will try to do better here.
- Praying more. Asking for guidance and my light at the end of this dark tunnel.
- Clarity.
- Finally writing that creative non-fiction novel I've been talking about for 2.5 years.
- Making peace with my past.
- Going to Barnes and Noble for an entire day and chugging obscene amounts of coffee while reading self-help books.


"When one door closes, another one falls on top of you."
- Some guy named Angus.

I'VE NEVER BEEN GOOD AT GOODBYES...

This part of "Already Gone" by Sugarland has been making me cry my face off lately:

The last time I saw him we packed up my things
And he smiled like the first time he told me his name
And we cried with each other
We split the blame for the parts
That we couldn't change

Pictures, dishes and socks
It's our whole life
Down to one box
There he was waving goodbye on the front porch alone

But I was already gone
I was already gone

BLURB

I discovered a site called blurb.com.

I highly suggest that if you are interested in writing a book you check it out.

They allow you to download a free application to create a book and then you upload it, pay for the print and they send you your book in the mail.

I just wrote a book for a very special occasion coming up and after a few minor glitches, that turned out to be my fault, my book is being created as we speak.

TYRA BANKS IS OUT OF HER DAMN MIND

Tyra Banks.

Oh, where to begin...


Sometimes models should just stay models.

I'll let these clips from The Soup speak for themselves:

BIG GIRL BED

I had to beat into submission a big girl bedroom set for Reagan yesterday. It's been a long time coming. She's been sleeping in our bed for a while now and I finally decided that it was time for a change.

I left the house last night and when I got back, Ben had put her to sleep in her bed, and she was still there. After falling out twice and throwing a fit, she finally settled down and slept there until 5AM this morning. Not too bad for the first night.

I think I had a rougher go of it than she did. I missed her goofy little feet kicking me all night. Of course it is an Elmo bedroom set. God forbid I would have tried to introduce anything else. If you're curious to see what it looks like, Click here.

TO MY MARIE

Dear Marie,

We have been friends for many moons now. We have chased bunnies in your backyard, started an Oprah fan club, designed iron on spandex wear and have developed a silent laugh that has been known to cause pant pissage. We lost touch, got back in touch and were able to pick up like no time had passed at all. You know more about me than anyone on the face of the earth and you "get" me, when no one else does. We have a sixth sense about each other's moods and quite possibly have ESPN when it comes to one another.

You may not be my oldest friend, but you are certainly my closest. (Are you tearing up yet you old sap?)

You will be getting married in a few weeks and your life will be over...LOL...

No...seriously. You will be getting married in a few weeks and if I were able to be there I would have said all the things mentioned above.

The greatest thing about a friendship like ours is that no matter where life takes us we will always know where to turn when times are good or when they aren't so good. When you need a laugh, you know I'll be here, and if you need to cry, I'll say something to make it better and if you just need an ear, I won't say anything at all.

I love you hidey. (our nickname for each other)

I can't wait to see you next week. How blessed am I to be able to jump on a plane and be there for you on the day of your bridal shower? How blessed are you to be graced with my presence...HA!

That's all...

VINTAGE MARIE

I think Aislyn and I had the same stylist back in '83.

Photo Credit: Some dude from 1983.

DISGUSTED

I am thoroughly disgusted that the state of California passed the ban on gay marriage.

We just elected the first African American President. We've come so far in so many ways as a country. To think that some can't still accept that love had no boundaries is astonishing to me.

Click here to read.

BARACKED!

It's official. Barack Obama is the new President of the United States.

I am proud of our country. I am proud to be part of a nation that can come from a point where African Americans weren't able to vote, to a place where we can see past color and elect the right man for the highest position in the land.

John McCain...I saw the old John McCain tonight when he congratulated Obama on the win. I saw a man who is proud of this country and will respect his President, even if it meant losing to him.

We need to come together as a country. The division that an election causes has to be overcome. We are ONE nation, one people and we have a chance to turn all of the current issues holding us back around.

WE NEED TO GET ALONG PEOPLE...

I am proud, I say it again....damn proud!

INDECISION 2008

PLEASE GO VOTE!

IF YOU ARE UNDECIDED THEN GO TO EACH CANDIDATES WEBSITE, LOOK AT THEIR ISSUES AND MAKE A DECISION.


Barack Obama

John McCain

YOUR COUNTRY NEEDS YOU!